5 Tips for Raising Your Teenage Girl

If you're a regular reader of Little Orange Dog, you'll know that I am mum to two girls, one teen and one tween. They're pretty amazing young ladies and if you've read my post A Letter to my Girls you'll know just how proud I am of them. Only today, I was immensely proud of Miss. D. Despite having had a migraine since yesterday afternoon, and still feeling very unwell, she got herself up, showered and ready for school. One look at her, and it was obvious she was being very optimistic. If I'd let her go in I guarantee I would have been collecting her by 9am and bringing her home again. It's those little things they do that surprise me and make me burst with pride.

It all sounds very idyllic doesn't it. The three of us sound like the perfect little family don't we? Well for the most part, everyone does get on. Of course the girls fall out from time to time. Yes they get stroppy on the odd occasion, dare I say it, Miss. L can get very moody and morose, but for the most part, it's all good.

So here's what I've learnt about raising Teen Girls.

1) Hormones start to kick in a wee bit before they hit their teens. They start getting all attitudey (I believe I may have created a word there) and it just gets worse. You never know if your sweet little girl is going to be just that, or if she's going to be an angry, fire breathing dragon. And even when you've worked out which version of your daughter is in front of you, the speed at which she can morph into the other version is unbelievable. My advice. Do not rise to the bait. If you take that angry monster on, you are not going to win, you will only end up feeding it and making it angrier. Pick your battles wisely; let them shout, stamp upstairs and slam their bedroom door and when they've calmed down - I repeat when they've calmed down, talk it out.

2) Periods this is number two on the list as it ties in with number one. Your teen will be a raging bag of hormones once a month, guaranteed. Follow the advice above, keep a good supply of chocolate in the house, and if you need to approach her, do so armed with said chocolate and a huge amount of caution. Be ready to beat a hasty retreat!

3) Sleeping is her favourite past time. She will become like a little hibernating creature. The little girl who used to run around the house like a loon, now needs to sleep, sleep and sleep some more. Even when she's not asleep, don't count on seeing her. She will still be in her room, which has now become her sanctuary from which she will only venture out in order to feed.

4) Eating is almost like a pastime. She will eat you out of house and home, then complain there's no food in the house. Know that you are responsible for replenishing food supplies that have been depleted, even though you thought there was still an abundance of said item (this will anger the teen, refer to number one for a quick refresher on how to deal with your angry hormonal teen). Note also, that when the teen tells you there is no food in the house, they mean, there is only healthy food left in the house and that simply won't do.

5) Friends are the cause of all happiness and all dramas. I strongly suggest not trying to keep up with who has fallen out with whom, it changes on an almost daily basis. Going out with friends is almost as important as sleeping. Be prepared to run a taxi service for your teen and her friends. Also be prepared for your teen to 'tell' you what her plans are, rather than asking (I'm going to point you back to number one here, there's potential for this to go very pear shaped). In addition to this, get used to the odd sleepless night (yes I know, you thought those days were behind you), when you have a teenage sleepover there's not a whole lot of sleeping goes on and they have no idea how loudly they are giggling.

So, those are my five key tips for keeping the peace and getting along with your teen. It's a bit tongue in cheek, but joking aside, these are the key areas I try to pay attention to when they're getting a bit stroppy. They're not doing it on purpose, they're just testing the boundaries a bit and trying to deal with their fast changing world. Take a step back, breath and think back to when you were a teenager. The calmer you're able to be, the quicker they will calm down and the more likely they will be to talk to you about their fears and concerns. Growing up is scary.

Other posts related to raising teen girls:

Tea, Teens and Consent